


I Love You and It’s Killing Me

by orphan_account



Category: Legacies (TV 2018)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-21
Updated: 2019-11-24
Packaged: 2021-04-11 02:13:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,954
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21515038
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Penelope Park knew the following things to be true -1.	She was in love with Josie Saltzman2.	Josie Saltzman hated her
Relationships: Hope Mikaelson & Penelope Park, Penelope Park & Josie Saltzman, Penelope Park/Josie Saltzman
Comments: 6
Kudos: 143





	1. Chapter 1

Penelope Park knew the following things to be true -  
1\. She was in love with Josie Saltzman  
2\. Josie Saltzman hated her

In the beginning, she held out hope for reconciliation, but after being called Satan and Evil for the hundredth time, she realized that Josie would never love her again. The problem was it didn’t matter if Josie hated Penelope with the entirety of her being, Penelope still loved Josie and she always would. 

So when Penelope coughed up the first petal, she accepted it grimly and didn’t tell anybody. It’s not like anyone could do anything to help anyway. Not even Josie herself could save her, love couldn’t be forced and Penelope had destroyed any part of Josie that could have loved her.

Penelope had been watching The Stallions play against the Mystic Falls team when she the petals she usually coughed up began to be tinged with blood. Josie had snatched the ball from some poor unsuspecting teenager and had skipped to the end zone. 

Penelope was watching with a smile when she felt a burning in her throat. She coughed violently into her hands and opened her hands to find crushed rose petal covered in blood.

“Fuck.”

Penelope stood up quickly and began walking towards the nearest building, hoping to find a place to be alone. Her impending death was really putting a damper on her social life. Her whole body shook as she coughed and Josie’s concerned eyes followed her as she left, her head titled in confusion and slight concern before her teammates called for her attention.

Penelope reached The Mystic Grill and immediately headed towards the washrooms; she could feel the cough building in her chest. She ran straight to the stall and coughed up blood and roses into the toilet. After her coughing fit, Penelope slid down the door in defeat. Tears escaped her eyes, this isn’t how she wanted to die, alone and afraid and unloved. She was so damn tired. 

A soft knock broke her train of thought, and she slowly got up and flushed. 

“Hey, I saw you run in. You okay in there?” Hope’s voice was surprisingly gentle.

“I’m just sick, don’t worry I’ll be back to kicking your ass in class in no time,” Penelope said as she stepped out of the stall.

“I might’ve believed that if you didn’t sound fucking terrible.”

“Careful Hope, one might think you care.”

“One would be gravely mistaken.”

Penelope rolled her eyes as she walked out, “You aren’t going to follow and protect me? What type of hero are you?” she said once she saw that Hope made no move to leave.

“Are you sure you’re okay, I could smell blood.”

“We’re not friends okay; you don’t have to pretend to care about me.”

“What type of hero would I be if I only helped my friends?”

They walked out of The Mystic Grill together, a comfortable silence between them. Much to Penelope’s dismay, Hope chose to sit right next to her on the bleachers. 

“You don’t have to tell me what’s going on with you, but could you at least tell me if you’re okay?”

Exhaustion weighed Penelope down and she wanted nothing more than to confide in just one person. Just one person and maybe, just maybe she wouldn’t feel so alone.

“I’m dying. I’ve been coughing up petals for weeks but now I’m coughing up blood too.”

“Josie?”

“She has no idea, no point in telling her she’ll just feel guilty. Or maybe she’ll feel joy that I’m in agony at this point I really don’t know.” 

Penelope looked into Hope’s eyes, tired and broken and miserable, “Maybe this is what I deserve. Karma getting her revenge on me.”

“We can fix this, there’s a procedure. You can’t just die when you know that there’s a cure out there.”

“No. I can’t erase such a huge part of my life. I won’t.”

“I get it, but you have to tell her.”

“I know.”

Penelope shifted towards Hope slightly, drawing comfort from being around someone after so long. After the petals she had begun to avoid people in fear that they would figure out what sickness ailed her, it felt nice to not be alone for once.

Over the next few days, Hope began to visit Penelope in her room more often as Penelope got sicker and sicker. Her skin was pale, she was constantly sweaty and she could barely go five minutes without the feeling of thorns scratching at her throat. 

On the 5th day after the match, Penelope heard a knock on the door.

“It’s open Mikaelson.”

The door slowly swung open and revealed Josie. Thank god she had just cleaned up after herself, who knows what would’ve happened if Josie saw the bloody tissues and petals that seemed to perpetually coat the room.

“Oh hey Josie, you okay?”

“Are you seriously asking if I’m okay? I haven’t seen you for almost a week. You look terrible. Are you okay?”

“Didn’t know you cared.”

“I don’t,” replies Josie without missing a beat “Hope asked me to check up on you.”

“Oh.”

Josie softens slightly, “What’s wrong? Hope seemed pretty insistent that I check up on you.”

“I’m fine Jojo, don’t worry,” the almost believable lie was undercut by a coughing fit.

“You’re not fine Pen, let me help.”

“No,” Penelope croaked out as she stumbled backwards “leave me alone I’m fine.”

Josie rolled her eyes and gently nudged Penelope towards her bed. Penelope’s knees hit the bed and she plopped down with a muffled groan. She quickly turned away from Josie and coughed up the bloody roses into a trash can nearby. 

Josie gently placed a hand on Penelope’s back as she heaved and felt her slowly melt under her touch. Penelope leaned back onto Josie who had lowered herself onto the edge of the bed.

Josie’s hand hovered over Penelope’s head before she gave in and moved a lock of Penelope’s hair behind her ear. Penelope shifted so that her back was leaning against Josie’s front and closed her eyes asJosie gently moved her fingers through Penelope’s hair. The peaceful silence only broken by the sound of Penelope’s raspy breathing.

“Penny,” Josie’s fingers unmoving as they rested on Penelope’s sweaty face.

“Hm,” Penelope hummed, her eyes still closed.

“I know you’re not okay so just please tell me the truth. What’s wrong?”

Penelope hesitates, and before she can get the truth out Josie has already propped her up on pillows and is standing at the foot of the bed.

“Never mind, I guess it’s too much of me to ask you to be honest just this once.”

“Jojo wait,” Penelope pleads, but Josie's already left.

Tears gather in her eyes as she whispers, "I love you and it’s killing me.”


	2. Chapter 2

Josie Saltzman was having a horrible time. Even though by all means, her life was finally looking up.

1\. The rift between Hope and Lizzie was on the merge (ha) of mending  
2\. Lizzie’s extra sessions at with Emma had her happier than she had been in a while  
3\. Her evil satanic ex had finally stopped following her around

Josie had never felt so utterly alone. Even MG, arguably her most reliable friend spent most of his time with Kaleb. The only time she had interacted with Hope (not just nod as a greeting, properly interact) had been last week when she had all but begged her to visit on Penelope under the guise of checking up on her.

It had ended with Penelope pleading for her to stay and with her walking away with tears in her eyes. Penelope had always ignored Josie’s halfhearted claims of “everything being fine” and would pester until Josie spilled her guts, but apparently never intended to extend the same courtesy being truthful to Josie. 

Fucking. Bullshit.

But the concern that currently weighed Josie down outweighed the frustration and bitterness she felt, so off Josie went to Penelope’s room with a packet of her favorite gummy bears. 

Josie knocked twice and before her knuckles could hit the door for the third time, the door opened up an inch to reveal Hope’s face peering at her.

“Hope? What are you doing here? Where’s Penelope?”

“She’s not here right now, I’m looking for my-” the sound of dry heaving interrupts whatever Hope was about to say.

“That’s her isn’t it? Why did you lie? Is she okay? She seemed sick last time I was here too.”

“Oh yeah she’s completely fine. Just a bit of a cough.” The sound of more retching backs up Hope’s statement.

Josie pushes against the door while Hope is distracted and steps inside.

She then promptly drops the gummy bears in shock.

“What the fuck?”  
__________________________________________________________________________

The first thing Josie notices is the bloody tissues covering half the floor. The second thing she notices is Penelope, slumped against the wall with half-lidded eyes, blood smudged at her chin and a trashcan held loosely in her hands.

Josie runs to her, almost slipping on a tissue and gently wipes the blood of her chin as Hope quickly grabs the trashcan and moves it far away.

“Penelope please, what’s wrong? I can help you, just please let me in.”

Penelope is slowly lifting her head when Hope starts, “Penelope’s been coughing up blood and p-“

“It’s because my coven got cursed,” Penelope interrupts. “My coven doesn’t know how to cure it but only the heir to our legacy is affected.”

“What the fuck?” Hope mumbles to herself as she rolls her eyes.

“We need to find a cure. I’ll tell my dad he can fix this.” Josie replies as her thumbs circle the back of Penelope’s hands.

“There is no cure we’ve searched everywhere,” Penelope pauses for a beat before continuing, “it’s okay Jojo, I’m not scared anymore.”

“Why not go to the infirmary?”

Penelope blinks.

“Um.”

“Penelope wanted to be comfortable and at peace when she died.” Hope blurted out.

Josie lets out a choked sob at her words as Penelope glared at Hope with murderous intent in her eyes. She gently grabbed Josie’s hand into her own and slowly lifted it to her mouth and dropped a soft kiss onto her palms.

“It’ll be okay Josie, nothing we can do about it now,” she said as Josie shook her head. “Could you help me up?” she asked softly.

Hope and Josie gripped one arm each and lifted her onto the bed where she settles into her pillows. Her chest slowly moving as the sound of her shaky breath filled the room. Penelope’s eyes closed as she nuzzled into her pillow with a soft sigh. 

“Hey Josie, could you do me a favor and grab a few tissue boxes? We’re about to run out.” Hope whispered so that she didn’t wake Penelope.

“Yeah sure,” Josie said absentmindedly as she slowly shuffled towards the door without looking away from Penelope’s face. She looked exhausted even as she slept.

As soon as Hope saw that Josie had reached the end of the hall, she shook Penelope awake.

“Ugh what the fuck Mikaelson?” She groaned as she attempted to burrow herself deeper into her blankets.

“You said your coven was cursed? How the hell does that help?”

“I don’t know I panicked,” Penelope mumbled as she picked at the hem of her shirt. “I didn’t want her to know.”

“How do you think she’s going to feel after she searches for a cure for a curse that doesn’t exist?”

“How do you think she’s going to feel when I die due to unrequited love?”

“Penelope you can’t lie keep on lying.”

“Look, Josie can’t find out okay?”

“Josie can’t find what out?”

“Fuck.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a viva voce tomorrow but fck education amirite?


End file.
